It’s interesting that I ended up both an elementary teacher and eventually an elementary principal. Let’s say I didn’t have the most productive career as an elementary student. First grade was challenging, and a personality conflict with the teacher made it even worse. I didn’t think she liked me very much, and the feeling on my end was mutual. Much the same thing happened in 5th grade. I perceived I had been wronged by an unapologetic teacher and proceeded to go to war with her. It unearthed my mother, and it took me several years to overcome the lost learning and instruction that I missed simply because I was stubborn and hard-headed. Looking back, I could have handled the situation better, but in my defense, I was an elementary school student and only beginning to struggle with the self-discipline needed to confront the productive struggles I would face as an adult. If I’m honest, I do have a bit of that stubborn streak; part of it was inherited, and part of it was learned. Still, a dog on a bone mentality isn’t easily surrendered and, in some cases, has served me very well, in others, not so much.
In middle school (at the time, it was still considered Junior High School), I learned to embrace the productive struggles I would face. As I did, I began experiencing more academic success. Some of it came with maturity, but my introduction to athletics and several excellent educators and mentors also helped. I was finally able to close some of the reading gaps that I had faced since early elementary school, which led to improvements in my grades, my attitude, and my general enjoyment of school.
What I wish I had known then and better understood now is the critical importance of embracing the productive struggle of learning something new. It is supposed to be hard. Many of us never get through the initial battle and attain some degree of competence when acquiring a new skill. Think about those resolutions you made two months ago. How many of those are you still sticking with now that it’s mid-March? I remember some years ago wanting to learn to play the guitar, but I couldn’t stick with it long enough to get through the initial struggle. I gave up and moved on to something else. If we are honest, we have all probably been there in some way or another. We found some new hobby or idea only to give up when it started getting difficult. Sometimes, our children may feel the same way about school when learning successes don’t come easy.
While we can work with them, give them great experiences, and read to them regularly, being a successful student will still require a bit of grit to get through the struggle that is sure to come. For some, it comes early and often; for others, it may sneak up on them later in life. Arriving at school with the work ethic necessary to face the productive struggle of learning is critical to a child’s overall success. Athletes know this; games are won many times on the practice field and in the weight room. The team that puts in the work brings with them an advantage. When making strides to get stronger, the athlete heads to the weight room and sees very little in terms of results after the first day. They may be a bit sore, but they probably can’t see that they look very different from before their workout. But, when you string enough days of sticking with it together, the results become apparent, and athletes who keep it up soon separate themselves from others based on how they address the productive struggle with grit and determination. The same is true of life in general. I encourage you to evaluate the message you are sending to the little eyes that are watching you. One of the most important lessons we can teach the upcoming generation is the value of putting in the work both in learning and in life.
Empty Your Cup... 